I have to manage myself. Manipulate myself as if I worked for me in a different body. Make sure I had all the little levers in the right spot so I will work overtime and feel good regardless. This guy needs arbitrary deadlines and pats on the back and gold stars I am thinking…
Here I capture new ideas, information and thoughts on existing ones, and move them around to slots for each day. I have the ability to plan a week out. 
this is how I have blocked out my days to allow for flexibility but themes. Research can be anything I am learning, such as painting lessons. Outdoor is literally get the fuck out there. Production is hopefully something that can just be knocked out that is relitively small to feel a “win” for the day. then gotta cook dinner for bb. you know. also going to do sabbaths! nothing is planned on trello either. 
learning watercolor technique – wet on wet. the aim here is draw the color from one blob into another either by pulling or pushing the color. 
also did a study of all the color blobs in my set so i could get a better idea what each one will look like. 
did another drill painting. i like the yellow part but I think i could have done a better job on the grey part. 
got a new drum pad. doing youtube lessons for drum patterns but learning it on this lil fucker.
How am I feeling?
- Good about the first 2 days. have felt the draw of learning and education. I have jumped into this time with a solid schedule that is working. This is a positive life force.
- Feel like I have to go to work tomorrow everyday this week so far. that will be a good feeling to leave behind.
- I feel like there are a lot of consequences in my life going on right now. As I have mentioned in past convos and posts. 20’s max reduced responsibility to a minimum. 30’s Max said okay to responsibility and hit it hard. that paid off super well for 30-31.5. now however every rock I turn over thinking I am doing a good thing reveals a turd or a turtle all the way down. consequence breeds knowledge however.
- Didn’t watch what my chicken ate so now she needs isolation and a force fed diet, thrice daily massages and she lives in my laundry room until she gets better or doesn’t. I have a much greater appreciation for life, death and bad smells.
- Went out to do some solid pruning on a Cherry tree was neglected in yard by previous owner – however – it has a disease that may kill the tree, have infected the soil all around it and could infect the fruit trees we were planning on getting into that same area. Spent 4 hours today burning all the pruned limbs I cut since they are not compostable with the disease. Lesson here is to learn how humans and nature exist together, and make sure I understand the care that these creatures are expecting.
Adultin’
